I spent years disappointing others in my late teens, twenties and early thirties.
Like most, I’ve caused a lot of heartache and stress to a number of people. I regret these actions and do my best to move on.
But the disappointments are still very present, it’s just this time they are full of good intentions.
To assume you can be happy in life without disappointing friends and family is naive. Being a Yes Man and doing things purely to please others is the fastest way to be miserable. My entire business model was based around trying to keep everybody else happy whilst suffering myself.
And in the end, I failed at both.
You may have to enter what you consider a ruthless and direct approach to life. If there are genuine and decent motives behind your goals in life then you should not feel any guilt for pursuing these. You might have to upset the people who love you most to do this because change will always effect others around you. And the idea of this will be enough to stop 95% of people from even contemplating it.
But how happy and centred can you be whilst doing things just to please others?
This drove me to a mental breakdown. I couldn’t even tell a client I could not longer train them anymore, all because I didn’t want to upset them or see their results suffer. So I’d take the responsibility for their health and run myself into the ground doing every hour possible to keep them sweet. Wrong decision but the easiest one to make.
I’ve changed my business model THREE times over the last 18 months. Each time it produces a more positive outcome for my mental health and my ambitions. And guess who benefits from training with an energetic and happy trainer?
It goes full circle and you end up making MORE of a difference to those who are in your company. It becomes a win win.
You can not keep others happy whilst destroying your own dreams and goals. You will lose this game and eventually the people around you will too.
So disappoint more people. Build the courage and confidence to follow your heart. Have faith that you are doing the right thing by making the changes you want to make.
Do not wait for certainty, it will never arrive and you will never feel ready.
On paper and in theory this is all very simple, but I have great empathy for those that are in truly difficult positions. Making a decision can be painful and often take years to act upon or even worse, never be made.
But do not lose sight of the positive potential outcome. It will always offer a glimmer of hope when times are tough. Ambition without action remains hope, however if you want an outcome you have no other option but to introduce action.
Are you ready to make a move?